Listening to: Landy Wen - Zhu Wo sheng Ri Kuai Le
Feeling: Tired & Tired
It's tiring to go through heartbreaks. Not my own, but others. Even though at most times we bystanders try not to get involved, it's inevitable that you're sucked into the middle of that nasty whirlpool of sadness.
Especially if it's someone you're close to. I guess when you're thinking of what to say (gently now...) you imagine you're in their situation too. I've been through too many to know that it's something to stay away from but yet here I am again.
It's painful and I'm afraid.
I should be single forever...
Happy Birthday and Happy Breakup. There is always something better out there that is better. It's just that you don't know it yet.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
Fast forward 3 weeks.
Listening to: Clazziquai Project - Fiesta (Daishi Dance remix)
Feeling: Melancholic
No matter how I look at things it is still depressing. How should we handle things? Can I make it for my Mecca? What is the situation now? It's a blank canvas of confusion.
Pushing the depression to the back of my mind (in some cultures, this is often labeled as 'running away from reality') I had some fun over the past three weeks...
We went white water rafting in Gopeng. I promise you this is the best anger management/stress therapy anyone can get. I screamed my heart out and came home as tired as a dog. Had a great night's sleep.
But let me warn you that water might be splashed around. It was fun though me and Fun went with a bunch of people we don't know except for Jae Han. Woots!
I also went for the Complete 5 BMW drive two weeks back.
We drove the X5 and the 5 series, naturally.
Drove on beautiful roads I never knew existed.
Witnessed the beauty of nature from air.
Roughed it out at the Four seasons Langkawi.
Magnificently showered like a queen in the outdoor bath in the room (in the Four seasons)
Did a Paris and Nicole (again) and enjoyed life on a mega yacht.
Had a splashing time on the banana boat.
Watching the beautiful sun set while I enjoyed my dinner.
Cam-whored with my sister one weekend.
Yeap. My life in 3 short weeks. More soon!
Feeling: Melancholic
No matter how I look at things it is still depressing. How should we handle things? Can I make it for my Mecca? What is the situation now? It's a blank canvas of confusion.
Pushing the depression to the back of my mind (in some cultures, this is often labeled as 'running away from reality') I had some fun over the past three weeks...
We went white water rafting in Gopeng. I promise you this is the best anger management/stress therapy anyone can get. I screamed my heart out and came home as tired as a dog. Had a great night's sleep.
But let me warn you that water might be splashed around. It was fun though me and Fun went with a bunch of people we don't know except for Jae Han. Woots!I also went for the Complete 5 BMW drive two weeks back.
We drove the X5 and the 5 series, naturally.
Drove on beautiful roads I never knew existed.
Witnessed the beauty of nature from air.
Roughed it out at the Four seasons Langkawi.
Magnificently showered like a queen in the outdoor bath in the room (in the Four seasons)
Did a Paris and Nicole (again) and enjoyed life on a mega yacht. 
Had a splashing time on the banana boat.
Watching the beautiful sun set while I enjoyed my dinner.
Cam-whored with my sister one weekend.Yeap. My life in 3 short weeks. More soon!
Friday, September 05, 2008
Saturday, August 23, 2008
The Love(s) of My Life
Listening to: Nothing
Feeling: A little sleepy
Don't you just love Friday nights? It's the beginning of a great day. Yes, it's Saturday.
It gives me that tingly feeling that starts from my toes and I crinkle my nose. The feeling always shows. Will be a happy, happy weekend. Caden's full moon party. (Wait for 'em pictures!!!) Going up to the hilltop for drinks again... A full sunday without thinking about anything else! Love, love, love!
Anyway, I am terribly addicted to this game...
I know, I know it's an old one but I only had time to start on it after God Of War... It is terribly idiotic and nonsensical but hey, it makes me sleepy!
I am also addicted to this extremely
Did I say sexy? Hot? Funny, Witty & Intelligent? And he's a MAN?
God, how am I ever gonna get a boyfriend if my idea of a man is Gerry Butler?
And with these blessed images in my head, I will continue Me & My Katamari.
Good night and happy weekend!
Feeling: A little sleepy
Don't you just love Friday nights? It's the beginning of a great day. Yes, it's Saturday.
It gives me that tingly feeling that starts from my toes and I crinkle my nose. The feeling always shows. Will be a happy, happy weekend. Caden's full moon party. (Wait for 'em pictures!!!) Going up to the hilltop for drinks again... A full sunday without thinking about anything else! Love, love, love!
Anyway, I am terribly addicted to this game...
I know, I know it's an old one but I only had time to start on it after God Of War... It is terribly idiotic and nonsensical but hey, it makes me sleepy!
I am also addicted to this extremely
hot
funny
incredibly sexy
MAN.
Did I say sexy? Hot? Funny, Witty & Intelligent? And he's a MAN?
God, how am I ever gonna get a boyfriend if my idea of a man is Gerry Butler?
And with these blessed images in my head, I will continue Me & My Katamari.
Good night and happy weekend!
Monday, August 18, 2008
W... T... F??!!??
Listening to: A/C
Feeling: WTF-ed
I'm sure most Malaysians who stayed home today to catch the finals of the Men's Badminton singles finals would have the same thoughts as I did.
It lasted almost 40 minutes and every single god-damned minute was painful, embarrassing and equally mortifying.
I mean, 40 minutes for a gold medal?
Really, our pizzas took longer to arrive.
On the 17.08.08, 9.30pm every Malaysian sitting in front of the telly had only 3 alphabets in their minds.
It was W... T... F...
Unbelievable.
Feeling: WTF-ed
I'm sure most Malaysians who stayed home today to catch the finals of the Men's Badminton singles finals would have the same thoughts as I did.
It lasted almost 40 minutes and every single god-damned minute was painful, embarrassing and equally mortifying.
I mean, 40 minutes for a gold medal?
Really, our pizzas took longer to arrive.
On the 17.08.08, 9.30pm every Malaysian sitting in front of the telly had only 3 alphabets in their minds.
It was W... T... F...
Unbelievable.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Thanksgiving
Listening to: Bee Gees - Melody Fair
Feeling: Pensive
Tools of the trade
There are times when I wonder I'm doing the right thing. Am I supposed to be writing or will I do better in sales, advertising, banking, events or branding? But ever since I joined Bintang, I feel like I am on the right track. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Feeling: Pensive
Tools of the tradeThere are times when I wonder I'm doing the right thing. Am I supposed to be writing or will I do better in sales, advertising, banking, events or branding? But ever since I joined Bintang, I feel like I am on the right track. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Berdebar-Berdegup
Listening to: Christina Aguilera - What A Girl Wants
Feeling: OH NO!
OH
sHiT...
It's Happening Again.
Feeling: OH NO!
OH
sHiT...
It's Happening Again.
Friday, August 08, 2008
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
Let's move on people!
Listening to: Guai Tan
Feeling: Happy and fuzzy. In love with baby Caden
Finally got this one out of the way!
Time for a new obsession!
Please say hi to baby Caden!
Only the cutest thing since Hello Kitty!
Will blog soonish...
Feeling: Happy and fuzzy. In love with baby Caden
Finally got this one out of the way!
Time for a new obsession!
Please say hi to baby Caden!
Only the cutest thing since Hello Kitty!
Will blog soonish...
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
The Black & Whites
Listening to: Sarah Bareilles - Love song
Feeling: Funny
I was sitting in our usual mamak place at Hartamas, which we christened '24' because of a certain store in Japan. Long story to that, we'll skip it for another time. So back to the mamak. I just happened to glance up onto the plasma TVs they have hanging by a corner and saw a quote from a certain famous person (I think it was Albert Einstein, bless his soul)
'If you want people to hate you, start changing'
It struck me as funny because it's so true! I wanted to start laughing and crying at the same time how true it was. I remembered when someone once told me that 'maybe Ex Company changed you'. I guess I did and as far as I know, it was a change for the better. I am striding forward in confidence. I am sorry I have left you behind, because this move had been for my own good.
To be very honest, much things had happened over this one month. I've never felt so bad about something like this before. It is hard writing this down because I have been humiliated in the worst possible way.
I've been called a liar, a shit stirrer, fake, a back stabber, immature, irresponsible and many more along that line. I was also told that I 'need so much work on being a human being' and 'so flawed that I don't even realise it'.
It was painful initially because all these were said by a 'friend'. At least I thought he (yes this was said by a guy. Not all bitches need to be female!) was a friend. Little did I know that this 'friend' had hated every moment with me for the past year or so. And yes, all that pent up anger was unleashed within a short week. Imagine the intensity. I never thought anyone could be so angry. And I never thought anyone would hate me that much. At least I know this person's got major anger management problems. And after giving it some thought, I got even more pissed because whatever that had been said is HIM who has been acting the way he said I did! (well, maybe not all but out of 10 maybe 6?)
It was disappointing and hurtful. Maybe I was being like someone who thought the world loved. And me being me 'don't get it when other people don't like them.' In short, I'm being thick faced. I might sound defensive but really...?
I don't know if anyone should feel this way, but I can tell you it really feels as though you're the scum that feeds from the bottom of the sewer. It feels shitty. And if you're only a little depressed, you might have jumped the building or crossed the street with a razor already. The bright side of this? At least I know who my friends and enemies are.
Do you know how betrayal feels then? I know a few people who refused to trust anyone anymore because of past incidences. Whatever happened had left a scar of distrust and bitterness in these people. They might not necessarily talk about what happened but they will never have another friend whom they will tell their deepest darkest secrets to anymore.
Like I said, I never understood why and I never thought it would happen to me. It's because I've got such good friends. Right. Or so I thought. I feel lucky because I still have friends who did and still will stick by me thick and thin and will give me a slap in the face whenever needed.
What I didn't know that there are also some people that are hypocritical and selfish. I am not gonna be nasty about what happened. I will just simply fade away from their lives.
Maybe some people might think that by writing about this in my blog might garner some sympathy votes, let me tell you now that I don't need them. Letting off steam on my blog is something that I can and will do all the time. I will not sugar coat or water down my feelings. I type with my eyes closed with my heart.
From now onwards I will not care what people I don't care about think about me. If you like me, smile and say hi once in a while. If you don't fuck off. The line is clear. Let's not pretend to play friends and maliciously talk about someone the moment back is turned. Let's be honest about our feelings. At least I was. At least I didn't use anyone as last resort, as a communication tool, as the link to things lost...
Just leave me alone. I need to rid myself of poison from my life.
There are just too many things I want to talk about here. But what's the point in explaining? Go figure...
Feeling: Funny
I was sitting in our usual mamak place at Hartamas, which we christened '24' because of a certain store in Japan. Long story to that, we'll skip it for another time. So back to the mamak. I just happened to glance up onto the plasma TVs they have hanging by a corner and saw a quote from a certain famous person (I think it was Albert Einstein, bless his soul)
'If you want people to hate you, start changing'
It struck me as funny because it's so true! I wanted to start laughing and crying at the same time how true it was. I remembered when someone once told me that 'maybe Ex Company changed you'. I guess I did and as far as I know, it was a change for the better. I am striding forward in confidence. I am sorry I have left you behind, because this move had been for my own good.
To be very honest, much things had happened over this one month. I've never felt so bad about something like this before. It is hard writing this down because I have been humiliated in the worst possible way.
I've been called a liar, a shit stirrer, fake, a back stabber, immature, irresponsible and many more along that line. I was also told that I 'need so much work on being a human being' and 'so flawed that I don't even realise it'.
It was painful initially because all these were said by a 'friend'. At least I thought he (yes this was said by a guy. Not all bitches need to be female!) was a friend. Little did I know that this 'friend' had hated every moment with me for the past year or so. And yes, all that pent up anger was unleashed within a short week. Imagine the intensity. I never thought anyone could be so angry. And I never thought anyone would hate me that much. At least I know this person's got major anger management problems. And after giving it some thought, I got even more pissed because whatever that had been said is HIM who has been acting the way he said I did! (well, maybe not all but out of 10 maybe 6?)
It was disappointing and hurtful. Maybe I was being like someone who thought the world loved. And me being me 'don't get it when other people don't like them.' In short, I'm being thick faced. I might sound defensive but really...?
I don't know if anyone should feel this way, but I can tell you it really feels as though you're the scum that feeds from the bottom of the sewer. It feels shitty. And if you're only a little depressed, you might have jumped the building or crossed the street with a razor already. The bright side of this? At least I know who my friends and enemies are.
Do you know how betrayal feels then? I know a few people who refused to trust anyone anymore because of past incidences. Whatever happened had left a scar of distrust and bitterness in these people. They might not necessarily talk about what happened but they will never have another friend whom they will tell their deepest darkest secrets to anymore.
Like I said, I never understood why and I never thought it would happen to me. It's because I've got such good friends. Right. Or so I thought. I feel lucky because I still have friends who did and still will stick by me thick and thin and will give me a slap in the face whenever needed.
What I didn't know that there are also some people that are hypocritical and selfish. I am not gonna be nasty about what happened. I will just simply fade away from their lives.
Maybe some people might think that by writing about this in my blog might garner some sympathy votes, let me tell you now that I don't need them. Letting off steam on my blog is something that I can and will do all the time. I will not sugar coat or water down my feelings. I type with my eyes closed with my heart.
From now onwards I will not care what people I don't care about think about me. If you like me, smile and say hi once in a while. If you don't fuck off. The line is clear. Let's not pretend to play friends and maliciously talk about someone the moment back is turned. Let's be honest about our feelings. At least I was. At least I didn't use anyone as last resort, as a communication tool, as the link to things lost...
Just leave me alone. I need to rid myself of poison from my life.
There are just too many things I want to talk about here. But what's the point in explaining? Go figure...
Thursday, July 24, 2008
No Promises
Listening to: ZzzZzZZ
Feeling: Abit sein la!
Hmm when was the last time I blogged? Man... time flies when you're having fun for real! Many things happened. Again I promise tobitch blog about it when time comes.
Having a ball at my new workplace. I really like working at Bintang. I do my work, I finish, I go home.
I am turning into some sort of a workaholic. I wanna save save save money and show some people that I am capable or ya know, even more capable than any of them can ever be.
Unhappy times, but when the going gets tough, the tough gets going!
Am looking forward to our August holiday in the highlands. It will be 3 days worth of not doing anything.
Meanwhile Aunty Jackie, Victor & Nicholas' are back from Holland. Can't remember when was the last time they were here.
It's gonna be a crazy week again! It's a 4 story weekend!
More soon!
P/s: Guess who is doing manga reviews? *^-^*
Feeling: Abit sein la!
Hmm when was the last time I blogged? Man... time flies when you're having fun for real! Many things happened. Again I promise to
Having a ball at my new workplace. I really like working at Bintang. I do my work, I finish, I go home.
I am turning into some sort of a workaholic. I wanna save save save money and show some people that I am capable or ya know, even more capable than any of them can ever be.
Unhappy times, but when the going gets tough, the tough gets going!
Am looking forward to our August holiday in the highlands. It will be 3 days worth of not doing anything.
Meanwhile Aunty Jackie, Victor & Nicholas' are back from Holland. Can't remember when was the last time they were here.
It's gonna be a crazy week again! It's a 4 story weekend!
More soon!
P/s: Guess who is doing manga reviews? *^-^*
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Tired Update
Listening to: Leo Ku - Love Song Medley 2008
Feeling: Tired
Loads of things happened throughout the span of two weeks. In fact, too many things happened.
I've lost a friend and stayed up too much for my own good. Now I'm feeling slightly sick. It's only a matter of time before I totally KO.
Will update when I get more sleep.
Feeling: Tired
Loads of things happened throughout the span of two weeks. In fact, too many things happened.
I've lost a friend and stayed up too much for my own good. Now I'm feeling slightly sick. It's only a matter of time before I totally KO.
Will update when I get more sleep.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
I self-tag
Listening to: Jets - Look what you've done
Feeling: Lolichin
Because I tidak malu I have decided to self-tag from ABC's blog about 8 totally random facts about myself.
Why?
Because I thick-faced and am procrastinating YET again... And so here we go...
1. I have a strange obsession on frogs
For some unknown reasons, I've been buying green and frog dolls. Don't you think they are so damn cute in their own ways? Their big buggy eyes. That silly smile on their face. But not the real thing la... The doll ones are so darn cute! Maybe hor, it's because I hope that one day I kiss one of my froggies they will turn into a prince. Hahaha
2. I don't think Brad Pitt is hot
I know some people will shoot me for this one but really, what's so hot about damn Brad Pitt? Apart that his wife is white smoking hawtness, he's just, well, Brad Pitt... Now, Tomoya Nagase is hotness. Guess beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder.
3. I heart LAVENDER
My favourite bath gel of all time is Palmolive's Aromatherapy in purple. Hearts! I will shower twenty times a day if work permits because I just adore the smell of lavender you get the moment you step out of the shower. Heart heart heart
4. I love reading crime stories, especially if they have tons of graphic description of the murder
Call me sick but I really enjoy shit like that. My favourite past time if I have nothing to do in the office is logging on to www.crimelibrary.com. Or if there's something gross/gory reported in the papers, I HAVE to google it for more information.
5. I can't live without gadgets, Wikipedia, the internet and my car
I NEED to go out everyday even if it's for a short drive. I have to touch my laptop & PsP before I sleep, if not I cannot sleep. I wiki anything that I don't understand and continue reading all the other links linked to that article. A short search might set me back an hour or two reading things I didn't really need to know (aka, Useless Information). I get scared when my cell has no signal or is about to run out of battery.
6. I wanna buy my own house
And do whatever I want, like, run around the house naked! OK, sorry, TMI...
7. I own too much accessories
I used to buy tons and wear them too. Now, it's collecting dust and I think I have only worn a quarter of it. And if I change them everyday, I might be able to wear a new set everyday for a month without repeating them.
8. I own too little clothes
I can only get through a week without repeating them. I suck. I should buy more clothes but plus size clothing sucks. Ugh!
OK, so this 'random' facts thing wasn't too random after all but I'm just totally procrastinating. Back to work now!
Feeling: Lolichin
Because I tidak malu I have decided to self-tag from ABC's blog about 8 totally random facts about myself.
Why?
Because I thick-faced and am procrastinating YET again... And so here we go...
1. I have a strange obsession on frogs
For some unknown reasons, I've been buying green and frog dolls. Don't you think they are so damn cute in their own ways? Their big buggy eyes. That silly smile on their face. But not the real thing la... The doll ones are so darn cute! Maybe hor, it's because I hope that one day I kiss one of my froggies they will turn into a prince. Hahaha
2. I don't think Brad Pitt is hot
I know some people will shoot me for this one but really, what's so hot about damn Brad Pitt? Apart that his wife is white smoking hawtness, he's just, well, Brad Pitt... Now, Tomoya Nagase is hotness. Guess beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder.
3. I heart LAVENDER
My favourite bath gel of all time is Palmolive's Aromatherapy in purple. Hearts! I will shower twenty times a day if work permits because I just adore the smell of lavender you get the moment you step out of the shower. Heart heart heart
4. I love reading crime stories, especially if they have tons of graphic description of the murder
Call me sick but I really enjoy shit like that. My favourite past time if I have nothing to do in the office is logging on to www.crimelibrary.com. Or if there's something gross/gory reported in the papers, I HAVE to google it for more information.
5. I can't live without gadgets, Wikipedia, the internet and my car
I NEED to go out everyday even if it's for a short drive. I have to touch my laptop & PsP before I sleep, if not I cannot sleep. I wiki anything that I don't understand and continue reading all the other links linked to that article. A short search might set me back an hour or two reading things I didn't really need to know (aka, Useless Information). I get scared when my cell has no signal or is about to run out of battery.
6. I wanna buy my own house
And do whatever I want, like, run around the house naked! OK, sorry, TMI...
7. I own too much accessories
I used to buy tons and wear them too. Now, it's collecting dust and I think I have only worn a quarter of it. And if I change them everyday, I might be able to wear a new set everyday for a month without repeating them.
8. I own too little clothes
I can only get through a week without repeating them. I suck. I should buy more clothes but plus size clothing sucks. Ugh!
OK, so this 'random' facts thing wasn't too random after all but I'm just totally procrastinating. Back to work now!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Thoughts at 2 in the morning
Listening to: Fish Leong - Wei Wo Hao
Feeling: Sleepy
This is how I feel like.
Feeling: Sleepy
This is how I feel like.
Monday, June 09, 2008
Nightmare on Crazy street
Listening to: Loveholic - Chara's Forest
Feeling: Pissed off
Yes, as I have mentioned I went to bed after I finished publishing the post at about 8.50ish pm. About ten minutes after falling asleep, I was rudely woken up by a loud banging. Then another and a few more within the next 5 minutes.
I already knew that this was my crazy neighbor so I went downstairs to check what the fuck was going on. And the banging went on and on. First she'll slam the front door. Then she runs (hope she trips) to the back and slams the kitchen door. Then she runs upstairs (hope she rolls down the stairs and break her leg) to slam the room doors.
The reason why she's doing all that? Another neighbor from the next street drove up to our house and stopped his car in front of our house to tell my dad (who collects the monthly fees for the guards in our area) that his next door neighbor's house got broken into and sort of overstepped onto her part of the ROAD. Yes, you read right. It was on the ROAD. The FUCKING ROAD. Can you believe it? I know I couldn't believe it.
It was seriously fucking incredible that she went and popped a vein over something as stupid as that. Well, in the past she has popped few other veins over things as equally stupid. Like people making a three point turn in front of her house.
Or like when my brother said goodbye to my mom. Fucking incredible.
I am uber pissed too that mom & dad refuses to let me make a bloody police report for grievance. Or disturbing the peace. Things like that. Pissed off. But good news is that we're shifting sometime soon. Hope the next neighbor is crazier than her.
That's it for now. I have dinner to eat!
Feeling: Pissed off
Yes, as I have mentioned I went to bed after I finished publishing the post at about 8.50ish pm. About ten minutes after falling asleep, I was rudely woken up by a loud banging. Then another and a few more within the next 5 minutes.
I already knew that this was my crazy neighbor so I went downstairs to check what the fuck was going on. And the banging went on and on. First she'll slam the front door. Then she runs (hope she trips) to the back and slams the kitchen door. Then she runs upstairs (hope she rolls down the stairs and break her leg) to slam the room doors.
The reason why she's doing all that? Another neighbor from the next street drove up to our house and stopped his car in front of our house to tell my dad (who collects the monthly fees for the guards in our area) that his next door neighbor's house got broken into and sort of overstepped onto her part of the ROAD. Yes, you read right. It was on the ROAD. The FUCKING ROAD. Can you believe it? I know I couldn't believe it.
It was seriously fucking incredible that she went and popped a vein over something as stupid as that. Well, in the past she has popped few other veins over things as equally stupid. Like people making a three point turn in front of her house.
Or like when my brother said goodbye to my mom. Fucking incredible.
I am uber pissed too that mom & dad refuses to let me make a bloody police report for grievance. Or disturbing the peace. Things like that. Pissed off. But good news is that we're shifting sometime soon. Hope the next neighbor is crazier than her.
That's it for now. I have dinner to eat!
Sunday, June 08, 2008
"I'm half awake now"
Listening to: Loveholic - 처음 느낌 그대로
Feeling: Tired
Just got back from Angie's place after an afternoon of good food, 80's music, gin rummy and great company. I won something for the first time after paying tuition fees for the last few gatherings.
Because this idiot typing this only slept at about 6.30am the night before (after a 'OMG-I-THINK-I-DROPPED-MY-PHONE' scare at 6.15am on a rainy morning) I am feeling bloody tired now. It's at 8.20pm now and I know if I sleep now, I'll probably wake up a few hours later only to not get any sleep at all after that.
And so a quick update on the past week. It was a busy week as I planned (and hosted) Cin's baby shower, I was also chasing to get my car, go for an interview, plan Nini's bday dinner and in between everything else still work on my freelance work.
Got tired of Full Metal Alchemist clogging up my laptop's memory space, (it was too good to delete... I still wanna watch it sometime soon) I bought myself a 160G external hard disk and a super cute pink Logitech optical mouse. As I do more and more freelance work, I think it's important to get invest a little on it. Well... the colour was super pretty too so I guess it was justified. Am mighty pleased with new toys and am now thinking of getting a new laptop on the company laptop scheme for more writing to be done.
To be very honest, I am starting to enjoy writing much more than before because I feel a much more appreciated and monetarily satisfied. No more worries about lasting through the month with that minimal amount of cash we get for hard work. No more worrying about what people think about your work. No more worries when I walk in at 10.30am-11am. I finish work and go home now. It feels damn good actually.
I'm going to bed now.. it's disgusting because its only 8.40pm now. But this old body won't allow me to stay awake anymore.
Feeling: Tired
Just got back from Angie's place after an afternoon of good food, 80's music, gin rummy and great company. I won something for the first time after paying tuition fees for the last few gatherings.
Because this idiot typing this only slept at about 6.30am the night before (after a 'OMG-I-THINK-I-DROPPED-MY-PHONE' scare at 6.15am on a rainy morning) I am feeling bloody tired now. It's at 8.20pm now and I know if I sleep now, I'll probably wake up a few hours later only to not get any sleep at all after that.
And so a quick update on the past week. It was a busy week as I planned (and hosted) Cin's baby shower, I was also chasing to get my car, go for an interview, plan Nini's bday dinner and in between everything else still work on my freelance work.
Got tired of Full Metal Alchemist clogging up my laptop's memory space, (it was too good to delete... I still wanna watch it sometime soon) I bought myself a 160G external hard disk and a super cute pink Logitech optical mouse. As I do more and more freelance work, I think it's important to get invest a little on it. Well... the colour was super pretty too so I guess it was justified. Am mighty pleased with new toys and am now thinking of getting a new laptop on the company laptop scheme for more writing to be done.
To be very honest, I am starting to enjoy writing much more than before because I feel a much more appreciated and monetarily satisfied. No more worries about lasting through the month with that minimal amount of cash we get for hard work. No more worrying about what people think about your work. No more worries when I walk in at 10.30am-11am. I finish work and go home now. It feels damn good actually.
I'm going to bed now.. it's disgusting because its only 8.40pm now. But this old body won't allow me to stay awake anymore.
Friday, May 30, 2008
A moment of Realization
Listening to: Sarah McLachlan - Stupid
Feeling: Stupid
I suspect me not being able to sleep is linked to the fact that I am stupid and lonely.
I should get a life.
And stop thinking 2 hours before 12am.
Feeling: Stupid
I suspect me not being able to sleep is linked to the fact that I am stupid and lonely.
I should get a life.
And stop thinking 2 hours before 12am.
5 Years of Pain
Listening to: Sarah McLachlan - I will remember you
Feeling: Melancholic?
I am on a blog roll today. 3 posts a day? It used to be 3 posts a month. OK to be honest I am just procrastinating from doing my freelance work.
So listen to me rant while I wait for my crimson wave to hit me.
It has been 5 years since I had started blogging. I realized that I am not a regular blogger. I have a regular job, so sue me.
When I was thinking about why I started blogging, I remembered. It was painful but I remembered.
It's sad but the pain was still there.
You went away. And Carebear Joe suggested I should start blogging. You know... to take my mind off things.
It was a time of troubles as well. My job wasn't going too well and all I could do was shut myself in the tiny toilet of the office with tears wetting my ugly black slacks and equally ugly pair of black court shoes to sms you about the painful death I wish my boss would die of.
You often replied to say that you would come back and stick nails into her tyres. It always made me smile. I never had to wonder what time it was then at your side. I knew down pat what time it was.
That was the 3rd year. And after the first time I confessed to you. Looking back, IT'S SO STUPID OF ME to continue liking you. It was obvious that it won't work out. I cried through your first girlfriend while listening to Celine Dion's All By Myself. I buried myself under the pillows when you tried calling back after I confessed over sms. I cried when you told me you're leaving for a year and a half and you might not come back. I never thought human could cry as much.
I remembered a month before you left. You were wonderful to me. You asked me out for drinks all the time and sent me encouraging smses. Little did I know it was actually you feeling bad for me. I cried everyday. I listen to damn Celine Dion and I cry. I drive for meetings and on the bloody radio was M2M's Pretty Boy, I bawl again. I cried every chance I had. So damn stupid. My eyes were so bloodshot clients must have thought that I was taking drugs.
The day before you left, we were just chatting on the field near your house and as we stood up to leave, you asked for a hug. It was uncomfortable because my heart was beating so fast the ground was trembling. We walked towards my car and you said 'one last hug'. I wanted to run to my car and flood the damn interior because I felt so sad. Was that love? Or was it pity? I remembered I was the one who pushed him away first. And valiantly said goodbye with a smile on my face. Next thing I remembered was driving back home with the rain pouring inside the car.
It had happened so long ago but yet it stays fresh within my memory. All in all, I was in sweet agony for five years. I thought you really was the one for me. Too bad you didn't think I was the one for you. When I saw you recently, I thought how did I ever like this person? I couldn't remember. Even now I couldn't remember why...
Guess I had only truly liked someone with such passion 3 times in my life. After my third rejection, how could I truly trust my own heart?
Feeling: Melancholic?
I am on a blog roll today. 3 posts a day? It used to be 3 posts a month. OK to be honest I am just procrastinating from doing my freelance work.
So listen to me rant while I wait for my crimson wave to hit me.
It has been 5 years since I had started blogging. I realized that I am not a regular blogger. I have a regular job, so sue me.
When I was thinking about why I started blogging, I remembered. It was painful but I remembered.
It's sad but the pain was still there.
You went away. And Carebear Joe suggested I should start blogging. You know... to take my mind off things.
It was a time of troubles as well. My job wasn't going too well and all I could do was shut myself in the tiny toilet of the office with tears wetting my ugly black slacks and equally ugly pair of black court shoes to sms you about the painful death I wish my boss would die of.You often replied to say that you would come back and stick nails into her tyres. It always made me smile. I never had to wonder what time it was then at your side. I knew down pat what time it was.
That was the 3rd year. And after the first time I confessed to you. Looking back, IT'S SO STUPID OF ME to continue liking you. It was obvious that it won't work out. I cried through your first girlfriend while listening to Celine Dion's All By Myself. I buried myself under the pillows when you tried calling back after I confessed over sms. I cried when you told me you're leaving for a year and a half and you might not come back. I never thought human could cry as much.
I remembered a month before you left. You were wonderful to me. You asked me out for drinks all the time and sent me encouraging smses. Little did I know it was actually you feeling bad for me. I cried everyday. I listen to damn Celine Dion and I cry. I drive for meetings and on the bloody radio was M2M's Pretty Boy, I bawl again. I cried every chance I had. So damn stupid. My eyes were so bloodshot clients must have thought that I was taking drugs.
The day before you left, we were just chatting on the field near your house and as we stood up to leave, you asked for a hug. It was uncomfortable because my heart was beating so fast the ground was trembling. We walked towards my car and you said 'one last hug'. I wanted to run to my car and flood the damn interior because I felt so sad. Was that love? Or was it pity? I remembered I was the one who pushed him away first. And valiantly said goodbye with a smile on my face. Next thing I remembered was driving back home with the rain pouring inside the car.
It had happened so long ago but yet it stays fresh within my memory. All in all, I was in sweet agony for five years. I thought you really was the one for me. Too bad you didn't think I was the one for you. When I saw you recently, I thought how did I ever like this person? I couldn't remember. Even now I couldn't remember why...
Guess I had only truly liked someone with such passion 3 times in my life. After my third rejection, how could I truly trust my own heart?
Love is... Patience
Listening to: Mika Nakashima - Find the way
Feeling: A little bewildered
"You don't know this but a few months before we broke up, me and Z my bestfriend were looking at engagement rings. I really wanted to marry N"
I sat there stunned. After all, N has bitched to no end about this guy, X. X was a bad person, X speaks to me with no respect. X doesn't have time to spend with me. X had another girl before he broke up with me.
X also had his fair share of bitchings and rantings. N is selfish. N is egoistical. I had tried so hard to change N. N is possessive.
I was stunned.
It is shitty to know this now when both parties has embarked onto yet another relationship. N received a diamond ring from current beau and seem happy. X is seeing someone else and seems happy as well.
But looking back, if they had been a little more patience they might have been happily married. There are times when knowing too much is sad. This is one of those moments.
Looking at it this way, its odd that sometimes chances flit between your fingers and impatiently you swat it away thinking its an annoying fly. And that chance might just never come back to you ever again.
It is not in my position to say anything about this situation, but one can't help but wonder... What if at that one moment someone backed down and said sorry. The ending might have been so much more different.
But it is too late now...
Feeling: A little bewildered
"You don't know this but a few months before we broke up, me and Z my bestfriend were looking at engagement rings. I really wanted to marry N"
I sat there stunned. After all, N has bitched to no end about this guy, X. X was a bad person, X speaks to me with no respect. X doesn't have time to spend with me. X had another girl before he broke up with me.
X also had his fair share of bitchings and rantings. N is selfish. N is egoistical. I had tried so hard to change N. N is possessive.
I was stunned.
It is shitty to know this now when both parties has embarked onto yet another relationship. N received a diamond ring from current beau and seem happy. X is seeing someone else and seems happy as well.
But looking back, if they had been a little more patience they might have been happily married. There are times when knowing too much is sad. This is one of those moments.
Looking at it this way, its odd that sometimes chances flit between your fingers and impatiently you swat it away thinking its an annoying fly. And that chance might just never come back to you ever again.
It is not in my position to say anything about this situation, but one can't help but wonder... What if at that one moment someone backed down and said sorry. The ending might have been so much more different.
But it is too late now...
Pain is...
Listening to: The Gorrilaz - Clint Eastwood
Feeling: A little sad
And I have a confession to make... It has been on my mind for the longest time and I had wondered for the longest time if I should blog about it because it seems so petty written... Well so here it goes...
I have, well I'm thinking more like I HAD a friend who I'm kinda alright with. I won't say we were really close but I had good times with him. We used to chat a lot online. We used to go out for drinks and have good conversations... I like him alot, temper and all. He's an artist and he's got artist behavior... You know, the usual mood swings and stuff. I guess we were good friends.
We went to Genting together for Coffee Bean, we went to KL for geek trips and discussed anime. We had similarities in music and movies. It was cool.
He started dating a friend of mine and everything was still cool. Hiccups here and there but still alright. We still talk, a little less than before but we still talk about silly things. Initially, it was just 10% less than what we usually do. Then it was 50%... suddenly, out of the blue, we just don't talk anymore.
We still go out for drinks, even if he sits in front of me he would talk to everyone else except for me. He would laugh at other people's jokes and look away when I talk. At first, I thought it's just me imagining stuff... But after almost a year of this looking away and ignoring I am questioning why.
Like I say, I have thought about it for the longest time and wondered if it's just me being sensitive but when people start ignoring your questions for the 10339303rd time, it's time to sit up and take notice.
It's a childish, 'Why you don't friend me' question but it's bothering me. What happened between us? There was no fall outs or anything. We didn't fight. We didn't disagree on something. It just happened. And it is bothering me because I care enough about this person to waste my time caring about this.
It is painful when someone you genuinely care about and like ignores you like that. I wonder what happened...
Chotto sabishii ne...
Feeling: A little sad
And I have a confession to make... It has been on my mind for the longest time and I had wondered for the longest time if I should blog about it because it seems so petty written... Well so here it goes...
I have, well I'm thinking more like I HAD a friend who I'm kinda alright with. I won't say we were really close but I had good times with him. We used to chat a lot online. We used to go out for drinks and have good conversations... I like him alot, temper and all. He's an artist and he's got artist behavior... You know, the usual mood swings and stuff. I guess we were good friends.
We went to Genting together for Coffee Bean, we went to KL for geek trips and discussed anime. We had similarities in music and movies. It was cool.
He started dating a friend of mine and everything was still cool. Hiccups here and there but still alright. We still talk, a little less than before but we still talk about silly things. Initially, it was just 10% less than what we usually do. Then it was 50%... suddenly, out of the blue, we just don't talk anymore.
We still go out for drinks, even if he sits in front of me he would talk to everyone else except for me. He would laugh at other people's jokes and look away when I talk. At first, I thought it's just me imagining stuff... But after almost a year of this looking away and ignoring I am questioning why.
Like I say, I have thought about it for the longest time and wondered if it's just me being sensitive but when people start ignoring your questions for the 10339303rd time, it's time to sit up and take notice.
It's a childish, 'Why you don't friend me' question but it's bothering me. What happened between us? There was no fall outs or anything. We didn't fight. We didn't disagree on something. It just happened. And it is bothering me because I care enough about this person to waste my time caring about this.
It is painful when someone you genuinely care about and like ignores you like that. I wonder what happened...
Chotto sabishii ne...
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Amazing Things
Listening to: Clazziquai - Gentle Giant
Feeling: Excited about work
It has been an exciting weekend. My first article was published. Drove up and down Genting alone. Went to Tamarind Springs for the first time with my bunch of amazing friends for me and Gem's surprise birthday dinner (well, the location was a surprise). Discovered most of my 'missing' jewelry and accessories. Got signed up for a cupcake decorating class next month courtesy of Drama as a bday pressie *hearts!!* Was present at a mummy-to-be heart-to-heart (No, the mommy is not me) Turning 26 tomorrow.
It's amazing that so many good things can happen in two short days. Will blog about it when I get the pictures.
Feeling: Excited about work
It has been an exciting weekend. My first article was published. Drove up and down Genting alone. Went to Tamarind Springs for the first time with my bunch of amazing friends for me and Gem's surprise birthday dinner (well, the location was a surprise). Discovered most of my 'missing' jewelry and accessories. Got signed up for a cupcake decorating class next month courtesy of Drama as a bday pressie *hearts!!* Was present at a mummy-to-be heart-to-heart (No, the mommy is not me) Turning 26 tomorrow.
It's amazing that so many good things can happen in two short days. Will blog about it when I get the pictures.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
The adventures of Lumewa, Nicgold, Cornie & Jasaiguar
Listening to: Clazziquai - I will give you everything
Feeling: Bored at home
It's Thursday and I'm home! I'm like thinking if I should start doing my freelance work and decided to blog about Melaka instead.
Yes, we were in Melaka and it was bloody hot. This trip was a girl's trip so the old gang got together and checked into Aldy Hotel for some nostalgic reminiscing of the good ol' days. Ahh but there is never a trip without drama but that's obviously another story...
Frog-chan to Giraffe-chan ikimashyou!
As usual, we took the old route of stopping by Seremban for the usual Hakka noodles and beef noodles while stocking up on coffee. I only had like 3 hours of sleep prior to hopping onto Connie's car. And of course being a new car, it was a non-smoking car! AHHHHH!!!!
We reached Melaka and headed to the hotel immediately. The room was still not ready so we went down to the lounge for a drink or two. I ordered the Banana Milkshake that was the bomb. I wanted another one!
View from our room. Not too bad for something that was kinda within our budget (i.e. CHEAP!)
Wonderful Milkshake!
After we freshened up in our rooms, Gem's colleague who's from Melaka brought us to this fantastic satay place where we had lunch. The sauce had pineapples in it! Unfortunately we were so hungry I did not even think of snapping a few pictures... But I'll gladly go back there for a repeat performance!
After a fulfilling late lunch, we parted ways with Gem's colleague and decided to look for this Peranakan Museum Seems told us about. Found it as it's just behind Jonker Street and parking was fairly easy to get. I love, love, love the architecture. I swear, with all this technology we are getting stupid. The house has got an air well to light up the living room and to encourage air-flow? Genius..
This is the Peranakan Museum. Worth every single sen of that RM8 we paid.
The sky was so damn blue when we were there in Melaka. Compared to the crappy hazy weather in KL, it was a blessing! BUT, because it was cloudless, we had to endure the sun. I prefer that to haze, so bring it on!
Blue skies all the way!
We walked and walked and walked. Shopped a little but ate loads and loads of roadside food. It was actually a miracle that we managed to walk somemore still...
Nicgold aka Sarah N cam-whoring beside Nini's new car!
Didn't do much after that because we were just too tired. And because my camera's battery died, I had to rely on Nicgold for pictures and she has yet to upload them.
I bought a kawaii Frog and from now on will be called F-chan...
F-chan enjoys sightseeing from the car...
F-chan's day out...
What you looking at? F-chan checks out mysterious biker
Just being silly
At the end, we were just super tired. Have some other pictures with Nicgold so will post more up as and when I get it from them!
Long walk home...
Feeling: Bored at home
It's Thursday and I'm home! I'm like thinking if I should start doing my freelance work and decided to blog about Melaka instead.
Yes, we were in Melaka and it was bloody hot. This trip was a girl's trip so the old gang got together and checked into Aldy Hotel for some nostalgic reminiscing of the good ol' days. Ahh but there is never a trip without drama but that's obviously another story...
Frog-chan to Giraffe-chan ikimashyou!
As usual, we took the old route of stopping by Seremban for the usual Hakka noodles and beef noodles while stocking up on coffee. I only had like 3 hours of sleep prior to hopping onto Connie's car. And of course being a new car, it was a non-smoking car! AHHHHH!!!!
We reached Melaka and headed to the hotel immediately. The room was still not ready so we went down to the lounge for a drink or two. I ordered the Banana Milkshake that was the bomb. I wanted another one!
View from our room. Not too bad for something that was kinda within our budget (i.e. CHEAP!)
Wonderful Milkshake!
After we freshened up in our rooms, Gem's colleague who's from Melaka brought us to this fantastic satay place where we had lunch. The sauce had pineapples in it! Unfortunately we were so hungry I did not even think of snapping a few pictures... But I'll gladly go back there for a repeat performance!
After a fulfilling late lunch, we parted ways with Gem's colleague and decided to look for this Peranakan Museum Seems told us about. Found it as it's just behind Jonker Street and parking was fairly easy to get. I love, love, love the architecture. I swear, with all this technology we are getting stupid. The house has got an air well to light up the living room and to encourage air-flow? Genius..
This is the Peranakan Museum. Worth every single sen of that RM8 we paid.
The sky was so damn blue when we were there in Melaka. Compared to the crappy hazy weather in KL, it was a blessing! BUT, because it was cloudless, we had to endure the sun. I prefer that to haze, so bring it on!
Blue skies all the way!
We walked and walked and walked. Shopped a little but ate loads and loads of roadside food. It was actually a miracle that we managed to walk somemore still...
Nicgold aka Sarah N cam-whoring beside Nini's new car!
Didn't do much after that because we were just too tired. And because my camera's battery died, I had to rely on Nicgold for pictures and she has yet to upload them.
I bought a kawaii Frog and from now on will be called F-chan...
F-chan enjoys sightseeing from the car...
F-chan's day out...
What you looking at? F-chan checks out mysterious biker
Just being silly
At the end, we were just super tired. Have some other pictures with Nicgold so will post more up as and when I get it from them!
Long walk home...
Random LOL moment at 6.30 in the morning on a working day.
Listening to: Clazziquai - Last Tango
Feeling: Like I've not done anything today.. =.=
Shimatta!
I've only slept at 6.30am this morning because of Nagase -kun...
Look at this ...
I think I couldn't stop laughing... Tomoya-chan, I hope you got loads of money for that... *sniff* As much as I love Tomoya-chan.. the hat is just not too hot. But thanks to him, I was able to stay awake to finish my work! Love him~
xoxo
Feeling: Like I've not done anything today.. =.=
Shimatta!
I've only slept at 6.30am this morning because of Nagase -kun...
Look at this ...
I think I couldn't stop laughing... Tomoya-chan, I hope you got loads of money for that... *sniff* As much as I love Tomoya-chan.. the hat is just not too hot. But thanks to him, I was able to stay awake to finish my work! Love him~
xoxo
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Living like a princess
Listening to: Piped music
Feeling: High class
And so my spa review got pushed to tomorrow and I am here with nothing to do till tomorrow. I'm just waiting for my Mukodono to finish loading and I'm gonna run back to my comfy room and just chill there till dinner!
Mandarin Oriental is officially effing coolass. The King and Queen of Jordan is in the house... Room's got a nice view. They have Asprey bath range in the room. And uber comfy king sized bed! Can live like this forever can or not? Only poo-poo is that I can't connect my mac laptop in the room. Boo!
I'm in the Club Lounge now (they serve coffee and scones for tea with wifi access and CAN smoke!) waiting and waiting. Lucky brought my laptop if not I'll be stuck with nothing to do!
This week is turning out to be mighty fine!
Feeling: High class
And so my spa review got pushed to tomorrow and I am here with nothing to do till tomorrow. I'm just waiting for my Mukodono to finish loading and I'm gonna run back to my comfy room and just chill there till dinner!
Mandarin Oriental is officially effing coolass. The King and Queen of Jordan is in the house... Room's got a nice view. They have Asprey bath range in the room. And uber comfy king sized bed! Can live like this forever can or not? Only poo-poo is that I can't connect my mac laptop in the room. Boo!
I'm in the Club Lounge now (they serve coffee and scones for tea with wifi access and CAN smoke!) waiting and waiting. Lucky brought my laptop if not I'll be stuck with nothing to do!
This week is turning out to be mighty fine!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Catastrophe
Listening to: Kelly Clarkson - The Trouble With Love Is
Feeling: I should be doing my work or sleeping...
Just got back from a drink with Fun and Jye and something weird happened. Everything was fine and dandy and suddenly rain started falling. And a gust of wind and all of a sudden we could smell this horrible hazy smell.
It's so odd. Even though the weather was erratic but this is just plain weird.
Last Monday, I was in Jarred & Rawlins in Bukit Damansara with Zoe and Sums for lunch and we felt a tremor. Like someone heavy walking pass. And I thought, ah must be the construction next door but Zoe grabbed my arm and said, 'OMFG, did you feel that? That's an earthquake!" and freaked out.
OK, we're in PJ? And uhm.. chances of experiencing an earthquake is like, maybe NIL?
"No, Fa I swear, I felt an earthquake before and that was it. That swaying feeling."
Well, I have to admit that we were seated on solid ground and the swaying was not exactly like anything else I've ever felt before. I had to agree with Zoe that it might be an earthquake. We went back to our offices and tried checking online to see if anyone else felt that but no one else did. Fushigi ne?
With these horrible disasters happening all around the world, Myanmar and China being hit with terrible catastrophe, I couldn't help but wonder if it's God's way of saying, 'Shut the fuck up and enjoy what you still have because it's gonna be the end of the world soon.'
Really scary thought but, who knows?
Shou ga nai.. We're so selfish. Thinking that we can conquer earth must be the stupidest mistake we've ever made since the philosophers think they can decipher what the stars meant.
Do your part. Know that you're only renting this space on earth from God. One day, your leasehold contract with God will end and you're outta here. You don't own anything.
Feeling: I should be doing my work or sleeping...
Just got back from a drink with Fun and Jye and something weird happened. Everything was fine and dandy and suddenly rain started falling. And a gust of wind and all of a sudden we could smell this horrible hazy smell.
It's so odd. Even though the weather was erratic but this is just plain weird.
Last Monday, I was in Jarred & Rawlins in Bukit Damansara with Zoe and Sums for lunch and we felt a tremor. Like someone heavy walking pass. And I thought, ah must be the construction next door but Zoe grabbed my arm and said, 'OMFG, did you feel that? That's an earthquake!" and freaked out.
OK, we're in PJ? And uhm.. chances of experiencing an earthquake is like, maybe NIL?
"No, Fa I swear, I felt an earthquake before and that was it. That swaying feeling."
Well, I have to admit that we were seated on solid ground and the swaying was not exactly like anything else I've ever felt before. I had to agree with Zoe that it might be an earthquake. We went back to our offices and tried checking online to see if anyone else felt that but no one else did. Fushigi ne?
With these horrible disasters happening all around the world, Myanmar and China being hit with terrible catastrophe, I couldn't help but wonder if it's God's way of saying, 'Shut the fuck up and enjoy what you still have because it's gonna be the end of the world soon.'
Really scary thought but, who knows?
Shou ga nai.. We're so selfish. Thinking that we can conquer earth must be the stupidest mistake we've ever made since the philosophers think they can decipher what the stars meant.
Do your part. Know that you're only renting this space on earth from God. One day, your leasehold contract with God will end and you're outta here. You don't own anything.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Jdrama Addiction
Listening to: Texas - Say what you want
Feeling: Like I need a drink
I had nothing much to do over the weekend so I decided to trawl crunchyroll.com (obviously the best thing ever since sliced bread and a/c). Finished watching Sayonara Zentsubo Sensei and had nothing else to watch, except for some dramas I had bookmarked from before.
Random clicking happened and by chance, just by chance, I came upon 'My Boss, My Hero'. Haiyo... so damn corny I thought but what the hey... the synopsis was pretty cute, (yakuza tough guy forced to go to high school... hrmm OK) so clicked on the first episode and did not look back... I mean... COMEON!!!
LOOK AT THIS!!!
My Boss, My Hero
This guy, I swear to God. Is evil. He charmed me at first frame!
Anyone this insanely good looking should be locked away and sent to me. I will educate them
Mr Nagase Tomoya is my latest obsession.
He's the lead singer for TOKIO. He used to be a backup dancer for some hot group as well. And he acts really well. Ugh... and oh so pretty! Why am I not born in Japan? AND on top of all that... He used to date Ayumi Hamasaki. Got dumped though.. Boy, he can sure come and cry on MY shoulder. Le sigh...
Look at this!!!
God is so unfair sometimes. Ayumi must had been acting on a moment of craziness to dump this SNAG!
And yeah, so that's my new obsession at the moment. Bear with me until this phase ends. And now I'm off to watch more Mukodono!
Feeling: Like I need a drink
I had nothing much to do over the weekend so I decided to trawl crunchyroll.com (obviously the best thing ever since sliced bread and a/c). Finished watching Sayonara Zentsubo Sensei and had nothing else to watch, except for some dramas I had bookmarked from before.
Random clicking happened and by chance, just by chance, I came upon 'My Boss, My Hero'. Haiyo... so damn corny I thought but what the hey... the synopsis was pretty cute, (yakuza tough guy forced to go to high school... hrmm OK) so clicked on the first episode and did not look back... I mean... COMEON!!!
LOOK AT THIS!!!
My Boss, My Hero
This guy, I swear to God. Is evil. He charmed me at first frame!
Anyone this insanely good looking should be locked away and sent to me. I will educate them
Mr Nagase Tomoya is my latest obsession.
He's the lead singer for TOKIO. He used to be a backup dancer for some hot group as well. And he acts really well. Ugh... and oh so pretty! Why am I not born in Japan? AND on top of all that... He used to date Ayumi Hamasaki. Got dumped though.. Boy, he can sure come and cry on MY shoulder. Le sigh...
Look at this!!!
God is so unfair sometimes. Ayumi must had been acting on a moment of craziness to dump this SNAG!
And yeah, so that's my new obsession at the moment. Bear with me until this phase ends. And now I'm off to watch more Mukodono!
It was a fantastic trip
Listening to: Justin Timberlake - Sexyback
Feeling: Bloody sleepy
I know, I know... I am supposed to update.
Over the past two weeks, I was on a jet plane to Penang and back. Drove on the fast lane (obviously it wasn't me who was driving) to Melaka for some history lessons. Expanded my frog collection. (I think I have this secret fetish for frogs) Walked in to work by 9.30am THREE times! (Like, OHMYGAWD!) Learned a whole new programme for publishing. Interviewed a group of three amazing and inspirational people. Watched 2 whole Japanese drama series over the weekend. Bought my second set of wheels. Finished a few freelance jobs. Got asked to do a few more. Work got fantastic thumbs up from clients. Turned 27 the Chinese way.
Yeah, what a great month.
Will expand and explain the next post. It's already 4am.
Tomorrow!
Feeling: Bloody sleepy
I know, I know... I am supposed to update.
Over the past two weeks, I was on a jet plane to Penang and back. Drove on the fast lane (obviously it wasn't me who was driving) to Melaka for some history lessons. Expanded my frog collection. (I think I have this secret fetish for frogs) Walked in to work by 9.30am THREE times! (Like, OHMYGAWD!) Learned a whole new programme for publishing. Interviewed a group of three amazing and inspirational people. Watched 2 whole Japanese drama series over the weekend. Bought my second set of wheels. Finished a few freelance jobs. Got asked to do a few more. Work got fantastic thumbs up from clients. Turned 27 the Chinese way.
Yeah, what a great month.
Will expand and explain the next post. It's already 4am.
Tomorrow!
Thursday, May 01, 2008
High Flying?
Listening to: Coco Lee - Secretly Loving You
Feeling: Wow-ed
Today I had my first private jet ride. Think Paris Hilton, Donald Trump and Cinderella all in one. Yeah, that's how I felt. More on that later...
Coolness.
Feeling: Wow-ed
Today I had my first private jet ride. Think Paris Hilton, Donald Trump and Cinderella all in one. Yeah, that's how I felt. More on that later...
Coolness.
Monday, April 28, 2008
A Story True To Many People's Heart
What the Modern Woman Wants By Amanda Chong Wei-Zhen
The old woman sat in the backseat of the magenta convertible as it careened down the highway, clutchingtightly to the plastic bag on her lap, afraid it may be kidnapped by the wind. She was not used to such speed, with trembling hands she pulled the seatbelt tighter but was careful not to touch the patentleather seats with her callused fingers, her daughter had warned her not to dirty it, 'Fingerprints show very clearly on white, Ma.'
Her daughter, Bee Choo, was driving and talking on hersleek silver mobile phone using big words the old woman could barely understand. 'Finance' 'Liquidation' 'Assets' 'Investments'... Her voice was crisp and important and had an unfamiliar lilt to it. Her Bee Choo sounded like one of those foreign girls on television. She was speaking in an American accent. The old lady clucked her tongue in disapproval.
'I absolutely cannot have this. We have to sell!' Her daughter exclaimed agitatedly as she stepped on the accelerator; her perfectly manicured fingernails gripping onto the steering wheel in irritation.'I can't DEAL with this anymore!' she yelled as she clicked the phone shut and hurled it angrily towardthe backseat. The mobile phone hit the old woman on the forehead and nestled soundlessly into her lap. She calmly picked it up and handed it to her daughter. 'Sorry, Ma,' she said, losing the American pretence and switching to Mandarin. 'I have a big client in America. There have been a lot of problems.' The old lady nodded knowingly. Her daughter was big and important.
Bee Choo stared at her mother from the rear view window, wondering what she was thinking. Her mother's wrinkled countenance always carried the same cryptic look.The phone began to ring again, an artificially cheerful digital tune, which broke the awkward silence. 'Hello, Beatrice! Yes, this is Elaine.' Elaine. The old woman cringed. I didn't name her Elaine. She remembered her daughter telling her, how an English name was very important for 'networking', Chinese ones being easily forgotten.
'Oh no, I can't see you for lunch today. I have to take the ancient relic to the temple for her weird daily prayer ritual.' Ancient Relic. The old woman understood perfectly it was referring to her. Her daughter always assumed thather mother's silence meant she did not comprehend. 'Yes, I know! My car seats will be reeking of joss sticks!' The old woman pursed her lips tightly, her hands gripping her plastic bag in defence.The car curved smoothly into the temple courtyard. It looked almost garish next to the dull sheen of the ageing temple's roof. The old woman got out of the back seat, and made her unhurried way to the main hall. Her daughter stepped out of the car in her business suit and stilettos and reapplied her lipstick as she made her brisk way to her mother's side. 'Ma, I'll wait outside. I have an important phone call to make,' she said, not bothering to hide her disgust at the pungent fumes of incense.
The old lady hobbled into the temple hall and lit a joss stick, she knelt down solemnly and whispered her now familiar daily prayer to the Gods. Thank you God of the Sky, you have given my daughter luck all these years. Everything I prayed for, you have given her. She has everything a young woman inthis world could possibly want. She has a big house with a swimming pool, a maid to help her, as she is too clumsy to sew or cook. Her love life has been blessed; she is engaged to a rich and handsome angmoh man. Her company is now the top financial firm and even men listen to what she says. She lives the perfect life. You have given her everything except happiness. I ask that the gods be merciful to her even if she has lost her roots while reaping the harvest of success.What you see is not true, she is a filial daughter to me. She gives me a room in her big house and provides well for me. She is rude to me only because I affect her happiness. A young woman does not want to be hindered by her old mother. It is my fault.
The old lady prayed so hard that tears welled up in her eyes. Finally, with her head bowed in reverence she planted the half-burnt joss stick into an urn of smouldering ashes.She bowed once more. The old woman had been praying for her daughter for thirty-two years. When her stomach was round like a melon, she came to the temple and prayed that it was a son. Then the time was ripe and the baby slipped out of her womb, bawling and adorable with fat thighs and pink cheeks, but unmistakably, a girl. Her husband had kicked and punched her for producing a useless baby who could not work or carry the family name. Still, the woman returned to the temple with her new-born girl tied to her waist in a sarong and prayed that her daughter would grow up and have everything she ever wanted. Her husband left her and she prayed that her daughter would never have to depend on a man.She prayed every day that her daughter would be a great woman, the woman that she, meek and uneducated,could never become. A woman with nengkan; the ability to do anything she set her mind to. A woman who commanded respect in the hearts of men. When she opened her mouth to speak, precious pearls would fall out and men would listen. She will not be like me, the woman prayed as she watched her daughter grow up and drift away from her, speaking a language she scarcely understood.
She watched her daughter transform from a quiet girl, to one who openly defied her, calling her laotu; old-fashioned. She wanted her mother to be 'modern', a word so new there was no Chinese word for it. Now her daughter was too clever for her and the old woman wondered why she had prayed like that. The gods had been faithful to her persistent prayer, but the wealth and success that poured forth so richly had buried the girl's roots and now she stood, faceless, with no identity, bound to the soil of her ancestors by only a string of origami banknotes. Her daughter had forgotten her mother's values. Her wants were so ephemeral; that of a modern woman. Power, Wealth, access to the best fashion boutiques,and yet her daughter had not found true happiness. The old woman knew that you could find happiness with much less. When her daughter left the earth everything she had would count for nothing. People would look to her legacy and say that she was a great woman, but she would be forgotten once the wind blows over, like the ashes of burnt paper convertibles and mansions. The old woman wished she could go back and erase all her big hopes and prayers for her daughter; now she had only one want: That her daughter be happy.
She looked out of the temple gate. She saw her daughter speaking on the phone, her brow furrowed with angerand worry. Being at the top is not good, the woman thought, there is only one way to go from there - down. The old woman carefully unfolded the plastic bag and spread out a packet of beehoon in front of the altar.Her daughter often mocked her for worshipping porcelain Gods. How could she pray to them so faithfully and expect pieces of ceramic to fly to her aid? But her daughter had her own gods too, idols of wealth, success and power that she was enslaved to and worshipped everyday of her life.Every day was a quest for the idols, and the idols she worshipped counted for nothing in eternity. All the wants her daughter had would slowly suck the life out of her and leave her, an empty soulless shell at the altar.
The old lady watched her joss tick. The dull heat had left a teetering grey stem that was on the danger of collapsing.Modern woman nowadays, the old lady sighed in resignation, as she bowed to the east one final time to end her ritual. Modern woman nowadays want so much that they lose their souls and wonder why they cannot find it. Her joss stick disintegrated into a soft grey powder.She met her daughter outside the temple, the same look of worry and frustration was etched on her daughter's face. An empty expression, as if she was ploughing through the soil of her wants looking for the onething that would sow the seeds of happiness. They climbed into the convertible in silence and her daughter drove along the highway, this time not as fast as she had done before. 'Ma,' Bee Choo finally said. 'I don't know how to put this. Mark and I have been talking about it and we plan to move out of the big house. The property market is good now, and we managed to get a buyer willing to pay seven million for it. We decided we'd prefer a cosier penthouse apartment instead. We found a perfect one in Orchard Road. Once we move in to our apartment we plan to get rid of the maid, so we can have morespace to ourselves...'
The old woman nodded knowingly. Bee Choo swallowed hard. 'We'd get someone to come in to do the housework and we can eat out-but once the maid is gone, there won't be anyone to look after you. You will be awfully lonely at home and, besides that, the apartment is rather small. There won't be space. We thought about it for a long time, and we decided the best thing for you is if you moved to a Home.There's one near Hougang-it's a Christian home, a very nice one.'The old woman did not raise an eyebrow. 'I've been there, the matron is willing to take you in. It's beautiful with gardens and lots of old people to keep you company! I hardly have time for you, you'd be happier there.' 'You'd be happier there, really.' Her daughter repeated as if to affirm herself.
This time the old woman had no plastic bag of food offerings to cling tightly to; she bit her lip and fastened her seat belt, as if it would protect her from a daughter who did not want her anymore. She sunk deep into the leather seat, letting her shoulders sag, and her fingers trace the white seat.'Ma?' her daughter asked, searching the rear view window for her mother. 'Is everything okay?' What had to be done, had to be done. 'Yes,' she said firmly, louder than she intended, 'if it will make you happy,' she added more quietly.'It's for you, Ma! You'll be happier there. You can move there tomorrow, I already got the maid to pack your things.' Elaine said triumphantly, mentally ticking yet another item off her agenda.'I knew everything would be fine.' Elaine smiled widely; she felt liberated.
Perhaps getting rid of her mother would make her happier. She had thought about it. It seemed the only hindrance in her pursuit of happiness. She was happy now. She had everything a modern woman ever wanted; Money, Status, Career, Love,Power and now, Freedom, without her mother and her old-fashioned ways to weigh her down...Yes, she was free. Her phone buzzed urgently, she picked it up and read the message, still beaming from ear to ear. 'Stocks 10% increase!'Yes, things were definitely beginning to look up for her... And while searching for the meaning of life in the luminance of her hand phone screen, the old woman in the backseat became invisible, and she did not see the tears.
The old woman sat in the backseat of the magenta convertible as it careened down the highway, clutchingtightly to the plastic bag on her lap, afraid it may be kidnapped by the wind. She was not used to such speed, with trembling hands she pulled the seatbelt tighter but was careful not to touch the patentleather seats with her callused fingers, her daughter had warned her not to dirty it, 'Fingerprints show very clearly on white, Ma.'
Her daughter, Bee Choo, was driving and talking on hersleek silver mobile phone using big words the old woman could barely understand. 'Finance' 'Liquidation' 'Assets' 'Investments'... Her voice was crisp and important and had an unfamiliar lilt to it. Her Bee Choo sounded like one of those foreign girls on television. She was speaking in an American accent. The old lady clucked her tongue in disapproval.
'I absolutely cannot have this. We have to sell!' Her daughter exclaimed agitatedly as she stepped on the accelerator; her perfectly manicured fingernails gripping onto the steering wheel in irritation.'I can't DEAL with this anymore!' she yelled as she clicked the phone shut and hurled it angrily towardthe backseat. The mobile phone hit the old woman on the forehead and nestled soundlessly into her lap. She calmly picked it up and handed it to her daughter. 'Sorry, Ma,' she said, losing the American pretence and switching to Mandarin. 'I have a big client in America. There have been a lot of problems.' The old lady nodded knowingly. Her daughter was big and important.
Bee Choo stared at her mother from the rear view window, wondering what she was thinking. Her mother's wrinkled countenance always carried the same cryptic look.The phone began to ring again, an artificially cheerful digital tune, which broke the awkward silence. 'Hello, Beatrice! Yes, this is Elaine.' Elaine. The old woman cringed. I didn't name her Elaine. She remembered her daughter telling her, how an English name was very important for 'networking', Chinese ones being easily forgotten.
'Oh no, I can't see you for lunch today. I have to take the ancient relic to the temple for her weird daily prayer ritual.' Ancient Relic. The old woman understood perfectly it was referring to her. Her daughter always assumed thather mother's silence meant she did not comprehend. 'Yes, I know! My car seats will be reeking of joss sticks!' The old woman pursed her lips tightly, her hands gripping her plastic bag in defence.The car curved smoothly into the temple courtyard. It looked almost garish next to the dull sheen of the ageing temple's roof. The old woman got out of the back seat, and made her unhurried way to the main hall. Her daughter stepped out of the car in her business suit and stilettos and reapplied her lipstick as she made her brisk way to her mother's side. 'Ma, I'll wait outside. I have an important phone call to make,' she said, not bothering to hide her disgust at the pungent fumes of incense.
The old lady hobbled into the temple hall and lit a joss stick, she knelt down solemnly and whispered her now familiar daily prayer to the Gods. Thank you God of the Sky, you have given my daughter luck all these years. Everything I prayed for, you have given her. She has everything a young woman inthis world could possibly want. She has a big house with a swimming pool, a maid to help her, as she is too clumsy to sew or cook. Her love life has been blessed; she is engaged to a rich and handsome angmoh man. Her company is now the top financial firm and even men listen to what she says. She lives the perfect life. You have given her everything except happiness. I ask that the gods be merciful to her even if she has lost her roots while reaping the harvest of success.What you see is not true, she is a filial daughter to me. She gives me a room in her big house and provides well for me. She is rude to me only because I affect her happiness. A young woman does not want to be hindered by her old mother. It is my fault.
The old lady prayed so hard that tears welled up in her eyes. Finally, with her head bowed in reverence she planted the half-burnt joss stick into an urn of smouldering ashes.She bowed once more. The old woman had been praying for her daughter for thirty-two years. When her stomach was round like a melon, she came to the temple and prayed that it was a son. Then the time was ripe and the baby slipped out of her womb, bawling and adorable with fat thighs and pink cheeks, but unmistakably, a girl. Her husband had kicked and punched her for producing a useless baby who could not work or carry the family name. Still, the woman returned to the temple with her new-born girl tied to her waist in a sarong and prayed that her daughter would grow up and have everything she ever wanted. Her husband left her and she prayed that her daughter would never have to depend on a man.She prayed every day that her daughter would be a great woman, the woman that she, meek and uneducated,could never become. A woman with nengkan; the ability to do anything she set her mind to. A woman who commanded respect in the hearts of men. When she opened her mouth to speak, precious pearls would fall out and men would listen. She will not be like me, the woman prayed as she watched her daughter grow up and drift away from her, speaking a language she scarcely understood.
She watched her daughter transform from a quiet girl, to one who openly defied her, calling her laotu; old-fashioned. She wanted her mother to be 'modern', a word so new there was no Chinese word for it. Now her daughter was too clever for her and the old woman wondered why she had prayed like that. The gods had been faithful to her persistent prayer, but the wealth and success that poured forth so richly had buried the girl's roots and now she stood, faceless, with no identity, bound to the soil of her ancestors by only a string of origami banknotes. Her daughter had forgotten her mother's values. Her wants were so ephemeral; that of a modern woman. Power, Wealth, access to the best fashion boutiques,and yet her daughter had not found true happiness. The old woman knew that you could find happiness with much less. When her daughter left the earth everything she had would count for nothing. People would look to her legacy and say that she was a great woman, but she would be forgotten once the wind blows over, like the ashes of burnt paper convertibles and mansions. The old woman wished she could go back and erase all her big hopes and prayers for her daughter; now she had only one want: That her daughter be happy.
She looked out of the temple gate. She saw her daughter speaking on the phone, her brow furrowed with angerand worry. Being at the top is not good, the woman thought, there is only one way to go from there - down. The old woman carefully unfolded the plastic bag and spread out a packet of beehoon in front of the altar.Her daughter often mocked her for worshipping porcelain Gods. How could she pray to them so faithfully and expect pieces of ceramic to fly to her aid? But her daughter had her own gods too, idols of wealth, success and power that she was enslaved to and worshipped everyday of her life.Every day was a quest for the idols, and the idols she worshipped counted for nothing in eternity. All the wants her daughter had would slowly suck the life out of her and leave her, an empty soulless shell at the altar.
The old lady watched her joss tick. The dull heat had left a teetering grey stem that was on the danger of collapsing.Modern woman nowadays, the old lady sighed in resignation, as she bowed to the east one final time to end her ritual. Modern woman nowadays want so much that they lose their souls and wonder why they cannot find it. Her joss stick disintegrated into a soft grey powder.She met her daughter outside the temple, the same look of worry and frustration was etched on her daughter's face. An empty expression, as if she was ploughing through the soil of her wants looking for the onething that would sow the seeds of happiness. They climbed into the convertible in silence and her daughter drove along the highway, this time not as fast as she had done before. 'Ma,' Bee Choo finally said. 'I don't know how to put this. Mark and I have been talking about it and we plan to move out of the big house. The property market is good now, and we managed to get a buyer willing to pay seven million for it. We decided we'd prefer a cosier penthouse apartment instead. We found a perfect one in Orchard Road. Once we move in to our apartment we plan to get rid of the maid, so we can have morespace to ourselves...'
The old woman nodded knowingly. Bee Choo swallowed hard. 'We'd get someone to come in to do the housework and we can eat out-but once the maid is gone, there won't be anyone to look after you. You will be awfully lonely at home and, besides that, the apartment is rather small. There won't be space. We thought about it for a long time, and we decided the best thing for you is if you moved to a Home.There's one near Hougang-it's a Christian home, a very nice one.'The old woman did not raise an eyebrow. 'I've been there, the matron is willing to take you in. It's beautiful with gardens and lots of old people to keep you company! I hardly have time for you, you'd be happier there.' 'You'd be happier there, really.' Her daughter repeated as if to affirm herself.
This time the old woman had no plastic bag of food offerings to cling tightly to; she bit her lip and fastened her seat belt, as if it would protect her from a daughter who did not want her anymore. She sunk deep into the leather seat, letting her shoulders sag, and her fingers trace the white seat.'Ma?' her daughter asked, searching the rear view window for her mother. 'Is everything okay?' What had to be done, had to be done. 'Yes,' she said firmly, louder than she intended, 'if it will make you happy,' she added more quietly.'It's for you, Ma! You'll be happier there. You can move there tomorrow, I already got the maid to pack your things.' Elaine said triumphantly, mentally ticking yet another item off her agenda.'I knew everything would be fine.' Elaine smiled widely; she felt liberated.
Perhaps getting rid of her mother would make her happier. She had thought about it. It seemed the only hindrance in her pursuit of happiness. She was happy now. She had everything a modern woman ever wanted; Money, Status, Career, Love,Power and now, Freedom, without her mother and her old-fashioned ways to weigh her down...Yes, she was free. Her phone buzzed urgently, she picked it up and read the message, still beaming from ear to ear. 'Stocks 10% increase!'Yes, things were definitely beginning to look up for her... And while searching for the meaning of life in the luminance of her hand phone screen, the old woman in the backseat became invisible, and she did not see the tears.
At the Meat Market REAL Crazy Sale
Listening to: Fiona Sit - Keanu Reeves Returns Letter
Feeling: Tired
Over the weekend, me, Fun and Sarah N were in town for the L'Oreal Luxury Brand sale. We waited for about half an hour and I initially didn't want to buy anything as I have pretty much everything I need at home. But as time passed, I was waiting in line thinking if I don't buy anything from that god damned sale I am just effing queuing up for nothing right?
And so after leaving our bags outside *I see loads of LVs splayed next to generic knockoffs aka Vinccis outside at the bag counter.. tee hee* we entered the ballroom. For a moment, I thought we were transported to the Afghanistan refugee camp. There were people everywhere. Huddling in long lines around the counters, queuing up to pay for their purchases and on the floor. Me and the girls decided to go around looking for our own stuff and meeting up somewhere in between. Hurry! The skincare stuff were selling out.
Sarah N and Fun beelined for the perfume table while I went to look for Cin aka Hawtmama's Biotherm skincare stuff. You see, I thought I might not buy anything so I offered to get her some stuff. And so I walked over and asked. Apparently that particular range ran out.
Walked around dodging crazed females grabbing their favourite lip colour at 70% off is quite hard. Imagine stray bullets hurtling past panicky people. Disaster. I was amazed to see guys grabbing Lancome Homme stuff amongst girls trying to get their hands on the latest Lancome perfume sets going for cheap. It was quite scary.
At the Shu Uemura counter, people were lined 3 deep from the table, trying to grab foundations (RM60) and eyeshadows (RM25). I didn't even get to go near the table in the beginning.
I was starting to think that everything was actually free. So since I didn't get to buy stuff for Cin, my fingers started feeling itchy. I didn't need cosmetics so I skipped that counter *unless you're equipped with special guards, there is no way you escape the crowd without bruises* and looked for the haircare section. Turns out they were selling shampoos. That one I need...
Looked around some more and nearly giggled to see bored boyfriends sitting on the dirty carpeted floors, keeping their feet away from the trampling of high-heeled elephants. At last I spied my favourite Biotherm White Detox C+ peel going only for RM30. GRAB GRAB. Took two of those and recommended it to Fun and Sarah N who I found trying to worm their way in front of the Shu Uemura counter.
I came out from the hall RM150 poorer and half dead. I wonder how people manning the counters managed to survive the carnage! Fun and Sarah N collectively spent about RM400 in there. Finally took a sigh of relief the moment we got out of the lobby... No more! No more I swear... *Dramatic drumroll* I've gotten my 2 year supply of that fantastic White Detox C peel and will swear off sales for the next few years.
Also spotted inside the madhouse, Kenny Sia who bought some Lancome Homme stuff holding on to some chick trying to maneuver out.
While I sustained injuries to my wallet, Fun got her calf scratched as some rabid shopper squeezed between them with her bag of products behind her. Ouch.. It bled pretty badly... Wondered again if this was worth buying your favourite lotion at 50% off.
It's a mad mad world.
Feeling: Tired
Over the weekend, me, Fun and Sarah N were in town for the L'Oreal Luxury Brand sale. We waited for about half an hour and I initially didn't want to buy anything as I have pretty much everything I need at home. But as time passed, I was waiting in line thinking if I don't buy anything from that god damned sale I am just effing queuing up for nothing right?
And so after leaving our bags outside *I see loads of LVs splayed next to generic knockoffs aka Vinccis outside at the bag counter.. tee hee* we entered the ballroom. For a moment, I thought we were transported to the Afghanistan refugee camp. There were people everywhere. Huddling in long lines around the counters, queuing up to pay for their purchases and on the floor. Me and the girls decided to go around looking for our own stuff and meeting up somewhere in between. Hurry! The skincare stuff were selling out.
Sarah N and Fun beelined for the perfume table while I went to look for Cin aka Hawtmama's Biotherm skincare stuff. You see, I thought I might not buy anything so I offered to get her some stuff. And so I walked over and asked. Apparently that particular range ran out.
Walked around dodging crazed females grabbing their favourite lip colour at 70% off is quite hard. Imagine stray bullets hurtling past panicky people. Disaster. I was amazed to see guys grabbing Lancome Homme stuff amongst girls trying to get their hands on the latest Lancome perfume sets going for cheap. It was quite scary.
At the Shu Uemura counter, people were lined 3 deep from the table, trying to grab foundations (RM60) and eyeshadows (RM25). I didn't even get to go near the table in the beginning.
I was starting to think that everything was actually free. So since I didn't get to buy stuff for Cin, my fingers started feeling itchy. I didn't need cosmetics so I skipped that counter *unless you're equipped with special guards, there is no way you escape the crowd without bruises* and looked for the haircare section. Turns out they were selling shampoos. That one I need...
Looked around some more and nearly giggled to see bored boyfriends sitting on the dirty carpeted floors, keeping their feet away from the trampling of high-heeled elephants. At last I spied my favourite Biotherm White Detox C+ peel going only for RM30. GRAB GRAB. Took two of those and recommended it to Fun and Sarah N who I found trying to worm their way in front of the Shu Uemura counter.
I came out from the hall RM150 poorer and half dead. I wonder how people manning the counters managed to survive the carnage! Fun and Sarah N collectively spent about RM400 in there. Finally took a sigh of relief the moment we got out of the lobby... No more! No more I swear... *Dramatic drumroll* I've gotten my 2 year supply of that fantastic White Detox C peel and will swear off sales for the next few years.
Also spotted inside the madhouse, Kenny Sia who bought some Lancome Homme stuff holding on to some chick trying to maneuver out.
While I sustained injuries to my wallet, Fun got her calf scratched as some rabid shopper squeezed between them with her bag of products behind her. Ouch.. It bled pretty badly... Wondered again if this was worth buying your favourite lotion at 50% off.
It's a mad mad world.
Friday, April 25, 2008
No Regrets
Listening to: Damien Rice - The Blower's Daughter
Feeling: Really broke
It's Friday and I'm home, simply because I am so effing broke. Pay is not in yet and because of some screw ups with previous company, I was paid less than what I was supposed to get. Last month was bad as well because I had to wait 2 extra weeks before pay finally came to me and was promptly spent on fixing my car and paying off my loans and debts. I am still as broke as that day. I am so tired of living like this laaaa *whines*
I guess this is 'paying for your past sins' as Seems says. These are things that you look back and say, 'I wish I didn't buy that damn phone with the card then...' No regrets la. Only learn from mistakes...
I guess there are many things we do that we might regret but remember these are things we could have avoided if we would had stopped and think about the consequences. Unfortunately, we always forget. Like how after I bought my handphone on credit, I vowed not to buy another thing on credit card. Then I bought my laptop. 3 years after that, I am still paying for my debts.
Fortunately, as long as I have my hands and legs, I can still make money to No pay for these 'sins'. I often wonder, what about those people who CANNOT pay off what they have done? Like, if you killed someone... Or broke something that is irreplaceable? If it's me, would I be able to get over that feeling that follows... that regret that will eat into your soul and follow you until the day you die? Will I take my last breath and instead of thinking how I had lived a full and happy life, wished that I did not do what I did 50 years ago?
Like, what if I called that person before he jumped off the building...
Or, would life be more complete if I did not abort that child I once had?
No one is without one regret that they can forget. But one has to understand that whatever it is, it is something we ourselves weave with our own pair of hands. It is not fate. It is something we have to learn and live with.
Do not let regret hold you back from living life. It is not reversible and it is your own decision. Let go.
Feeling: Really broke
It's Friday and I'm home, simply because I am so effing broke. Pay is not in yet and because of some screw ups with previous company, I was paid less than what I was supposed to get. Last month was bad as well because I had to wait 2 extra weeks before pay finally came to me and was promptly spent on fixing my car and paying off my loans and debts. I am still as broke as that day. I am so tired of living like this laaaa *whines*
I guess this is 'paying for your past sins' as Seems says. These are things that you look back and say, 'I wish I didn't buy that damn phone with the card then...' No regrets la. Only learn from mistakes...
I guess there are many things we do that we might regret but remember these are things we could have avoided if we would had stopped and think about the consequences. Unfortunately, we always forget. Like how after I bought my handphone on credit, I vowed not to buy another thing on credit card. Then I bought my laptop. 3 years after that, I am still paying for my debts.
Fortunately, as long as I have my hands and legs, I can still make money to No pay for these 'sins'. I often wonder, what about those people who CANNOT pay off what they have done? Like, if you killed someone... Or broke something that is irreplaceable? If it's me, would I be able to get over that feeling that follows... that regret that will eat into your soul and follow you until the day you die? Will I take my last breath and instead of thinking how I had lived a full and happy life, wished that I did not do what I did 50 years ago?
Like, what if I called that person before he jumped off the building...
Or, would life be more complete if I did not abort that child I once had?
No one is without one regret that they can forget. But one has to understand that whatever it is, it is something we ourselves weave with our own pair of hands. It is not fate. It is something we have to learn and live with.
Do not let regret hold you back from living life. It is not reversible and it is your own decision. Let go.
Get set, GO!
Listening to: Eason Chan - Lonely Christmas
Feeling: Mundane
And so the work begins... Today was the first day I 'sent something to the queue'. Which basically means that I've put in work. Working is so different here at The Bintang. Like I've said, people are less chatty and more serious but Seems insisted that it's because I'm sitting on the wrong floor. Well, I'm just sitting in my little corner doing whatever I need to and leave by 6pm. I'm loving it.
I feel that there are many changes in my life. Not sure when it will start happening or when it will hit me but it is slowly starting. It is extremely scary when things are going so well. You can only wonder when the downside starting. Not to sound negative but it is a theory of Yin & Yang, without the shadow how can there be light? Well, strange thoughts at 3am. Better stop ranting now.
I am busy with many things now. Doing freelance for friends and trying to save up Andenough for Japan. Meanwhile I'm also trying to make some lifestyle changes like trying to stop myself from spending so much. Trying to pay off my credit cards, trying alot of other things. It's not easy with my credit bills, but well it's the first step...
And so while taking baby steps towards the 'real adult life', I will continue to stay strong and soldier on. I am blessed with good friends and luck. I will survive this big bad world!!!
That's all!
Feeling: Mundane
And so the work begins... Today was the first day I 'sent something to the queue'. Which basically means that I've put in work. Working is so different here at The Bintang. Like I've said, people are less chatty and more serious but Seems insisted that it's because I'm sitting on the wrong floor. Well, I'm just sitting in my little corner doing whatever I need to and leave by 6pm. I'm loving it.
I feel that there are many changes in my life. Not sure when it will start happening or when it will hit me but it is slowly starting. It is extremely scary when things are going so well. You can only wonder when the downside starting. Not to sound negative but it is a theory of Yin & Yang, without the shadow how can there be light? Well, strange thoughts at 3am. Better stop ranting now.
I am busy with many things now. Doing freelance for friends and trying to save up Andenough for Japan. Meanwhile I'm also trying to make some lifestyle changes like trying to stop myself from spending so much. Trying to pay off my credit cards, trying alot of other things. It's not easy with my credit bills, but well it's the first step...
And so while taking baby steps towards the 'real adult life', I will continue to stay strong and soldier on. I am blessed with good friends and luck. I will survive this big bad world!!!
That's all!
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Nuts About Bananas
Listening to: Nothing
Feeling: Extremely sleepy
I just came back from Fun's house after freaking myself out watching 'Kuai Tan', some kickass Hong Kong talk show/horror reality program.
And decided that I should have a bowl of Banana Nut Crunch with HL Milk.
Burp...
Just thought I'd share
Feeling: Extremely sleepy
I just came back from Fun's house after freaking myself out watching 'Kuai Tan', some kickass Hong Kong talk show/horror reality program.
And decided that I should have a bowl of Banana Nut Crunch with HL Milk.
Burp...
Just thought I'd share
Friday, April 11, 2008
The start of The Bintang Chronicles
Listening to: Fish Leong - Chung Zai (I thinks)
Feeling: Like I've burnt a few bras
I don't know about you guys but starting a new job isn't exactly what I wanna do every two years or so... The hassle of getting used to a new system, trying to remember a few thousand new names is just too taxing for my brain. But then again, change is something everyone needs to go through so I'm gonna soldier on.
After 2 and a half years working in a magazine, the decision to head over to Bintang *doing a very different type of writing no less* made everyone look at me as though I was KLAZY. Few nasty and negative comments aside, I went on with it. I have Seems & WP to thank for knocking some sense into my head as I wanted to forgo Bintang for something else less challenging. WP whipped out her notepad and pen *a proper journalist should always keep one handy in purse* and started calculating the benefits and Seem's ultra destructive stare did it. I decided to give myself a go by doing Bintang. Trust me, I shat bricks amongst other things. It was a scary decision. It was intimidating but I told myself, what scares me usually will work out and what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. Damn positive right? hurhur
So fast forward to the last week at the office, the HW Girls (tm) gave me a farewell fit for a Queen. After all, I was the first one to make it out. *this is starting to sound like Prison Break season 8* I had a week-long celebration. I love them all and I knew from the moment I decided to leave I will miss them. I will miss The Office. The familiar faces, sounds and smell of The Office. My last day, well technically my official last day was on Thursday but I came back to finish my work and cleaned up my desk, was a blast. Again the gang took me to George and the Dragon in Bangsar Shopping Center and I passed out. For half an hour. How embarrassing. I.Fucking.Passed.Out.Ala.Bali. Floor open up and swallow me now. Never, ever gonna drink EVER AGAIN!!11!111!!!
I came back over the weekend to clean out my desk. As I separated old press releases to recycle I thought, how easy it was to just throw off 3 years of memories but to forget the experiences and people I've met it was almost just impossible. At the end of the clearing out (It took me two days!), my desk for almost 3 years was empty and bare. I couldn't recognise it lo!
I left the lubricant for Zoe. I'm sure she'll have better use for it then me
I looked back one last time and took this picture before leaving. So sad. I was glad to leave but sad that I have to leave everything else behind. I still meet HW Girls (tm) up for lunch. And it has only been two weeks since I left. And so many more things had happened since. Funny that now that I'm detached from the situation but still feel very much part of everything. Guess you can't just go and immediately forget about everything that had happened.
Had a week long 'holiday' before I started at Bintang. Was crazy busy with freelance that I hope will let me earn enough money for Japan. The week just flew by. Did everything I needed to do *except for washing my car* and met up with people I've not seen for yonks and braced myself for the dreaded first day.
Sunday came and still went out for drinks. I guess realization had yet to sink in. Slept pretty late and predictably, woke up a little late. Got a red packet from Mom for luck *my mom is so cute cause she observes all these traditions* and I sped off in top speed with just enough time to buy my daily coffee and managed to have a ciggie before I reach my new office. It's nearer than my previous office therefore finishing a ciggie before I enter the building is actually quite impossible unless I light up right after I leave my house.
As I took the lift up to the HR Dept. I thought how different it was to the old office. I actually have to take a LIFT up to my office as opposed to walking up the stairs back in the old days. Unfamiliar faces greet me. Then it set in that I have left comfort zone. This is as uncomfortable as it gets. I have to wait for almost 20 minutes for a briefing. A BRIEFING? Yes a briefing of whos who, rules and regulation. A little bit on Union laws (huh?), it took almost an hour. By the time my friendly HR guy took me to my office floor to meet my new boss, I was freaking out.
My eyes were glazed over from the lack of nicotine and caffeine. I guess I had the deer caught in headlights look cause my boss asked if I needed coffee... hah! We went for coffee and ciggies. Then went for lunch and totally got geeked out by this transponder thingy that we use to exit and enter the parking. Sure beats having to double park all the time.
I left the office at 5pm on my first day. Apparently it's the norm if you don't have work, you can go home. Wow.. I can live with that. 4 days passed in a blur. Things I found out in this short 4 days...
1. You can only smoke outside the building, where everyone who comes in gets a clear view who's gonna die soon from lung cancer. I only smoke during lunch and make it up by trying to jam as many sticks into my mouth. (KIDDING!)
2. Coming in at 10.30am is A-OH-KAY. Yippee. Just get your work done...
3. I get my own computer terminal (phew) and cannot do msn. I gtalk now
4. There are specific programmes for assignments, leave approvals, internal msging system and online archives. We even have a library...
5. People on my floor has the age average of 35. Maybe 40. But all really nice people.
6. I am a 'funky' dresser. Wait till they see the mag people.
7. Everyone wears slacks and shirts. Except for me.
8. I got a window seat. And a wonderful view of other windows. Groovy!
9. My desk is so small. Only half of my previous one. :(
10. My desktop plays music. But no one listens to music. And I played Spice Girls today really softly after playing 'The best of 1990s' for the past 3 days. Cannot tahan. Wait till I burn my Japanese pop. I think the sub that sits in front of me will cry.
All in all, culture shock for the first few days which was understandable. Now I have to try to adjust my sleeping time to a more normal timing. I am still sleeping at 4am. And waking up at 9.30 if I'm lucky. Eyebags are gonna sag lower than my boobs if I don't stop doing this.
It's 4 am now. I go sleep!
Bintang Chronicles TBC!!!
Feeling: Like I've burnt a few bras
I don't know about you guys but starting a new job isn't exactly what I wanna do every two years or so... The hassle of getting used to a new system, trying to remember a few thousand new names is just too taxing for my brain. But then again, change is something everyone needs to go through so I'm gonna soldier on.
After 2 and a half years working in a magazine, the decision to head over to Bintang *doing a very different type of writing no less* made everyone look at me as though I was KLAZY. Few nasty and negative comments aside, I went on with it. I have Seems & WP to thank for knocking some sense into my head as I wanted to forgo Bintang for something else less challenging. WP whipped out her notepad and pen *a proper journalist should always keep one handy in purse* and started calculating the benefits and Seem's ultra destructive stare did it. I decided to give myself a go by doing Bintang. Trust me, I shat bricks amongst other things. It was a scary decision. It was intimidating but I told myself, what scares me usually will work out and what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. Damn positive right? hurhur
So fast forward to the last week at the office, the HW Girls (tm) gave me a farewell fit for a Queen. After all, I was the first one to make it out. *this is starting to sound like Prison Break season 8* I had a week-long celebration. I love them all and I knew from the moment I decided to leave I will miss them. I will miss The Office. The familiar faces, sounds and smell of The Office. My last day, well technically my official last day was on Thursday but I came back to finish my work and cleaned up my desk, was a blast. Again the gang took me to George and the Dragon in Bangsar Shopping Center and I passed out. For half an hour. How embarrassing. I.Fucking.Passed.Out.Ala.Bali. Floor open up and swallow me now. Never, ever gonna drink EVER AGAIN!!11!111!!!
I came back over the weekend to clean out my desk. As I separated old press releases to recycle I thought, how easy it was to just throw off 3 years of memories but to forget the experiences and people I've met it was almost just impossible. At the end of the clearing out (It took me two days!), my desk for almost 3 years was empty and bare. I couldn't recognise it lo!
I left the lubricant for Zoe. I'm sure she'll have better use for it then me
I looked back one last time and took this picture before leaving. So sad. I was glad to leave but sad that I have to leave everything else behind. I still meet HW Girls (tm) up for lunch. And it has only been two weeks since I left. And so many more things had happened since. Funny that now that I'm detached from the situation but still feel very much part of everything. Guess you can't just go and immediately forget about everything that had happened.
Had a week long 'holiday' before I started at Bintang. Was crazy busy with freelance that I hope will let me earn enough money for Japan. The week just flew by. Did everything I needed to do *except for washing my car* and met up with people I've not seen for yonks and braced myself for the dreaded first day.
Sunday came and still went out for drinks. I guess realization had yet to sink in. Slept pretty late and predictably, woke up a little late. Got a red packet from Mom for luck *my mom is so cute cause she observes all these traditions* and I sped off in top speed with just enough time to buy my daily coffee and managed to have a ciggie before I reach my new office. It's nearer than my previous office therefore finishing a ciggie before I enter the building is actually quite impossible unless I light up right after I leave my house.
As I took the lift up to the HR Dept. I thought how different it was to the old office. I actually have to take a LIFT up to my office as opposed to walking up the stairs back in the old days. Unfamiliar faces greet me. Then it set in that I have left comfort zone. This is as uncomfortable as it gets. I have to wait for almost 20 minutes for a briefing. A BRIEFING? Yes a briefing of whos who, rules and regulation. A little bit on Union laws (huh?), it took almost an hour. By the time my friendly HR guy took me to my office floor to meet my new boss, I was freaking out.
My eyes were glazed over from the lack of nicotine and caffeine. I guess I had the deer caught in headlights look cause my boss asked if I needed coffee... hah! We went for coffee and ciggies. Then went for lunch and totally got geeked out by this transponder thingy that we use to exit and enter the parking. Sure beats having to double park all the time.
I left the office at 5pm on my first day. Apparently it's the norm if you don't have work, you can go home. Wow.. I can live with that. 4 days passed in a blur. Things I found out in this short 4 days...
1. You can only smoke outside the building, where everyone who comes in gets a clear view who's gonna die soon from lung cancer. I only smoke during lunch and make it up by trying to jam as many sticks into my mouth. (KIDDING!)
2. Coming in at 10.30am is A-OH-KAY. Yippee. Just get your work done...
3. I get my own computer terminal (phew) and cannot do msn. I gtalk now
4. There are specific programmes for assignments, leave approvals, internal msging system and online archives. We even have a library...
5. People on my floor has the age average of 35. Maybe 40. But all really nice people.
6. I am a 'funky' dresser. Wait till they see the mag people.
7. Everyone wears slacks and shirts. Except for me.
8. I got a window seat. And a wonderful view of other windows. Groovy!
9. My desk is so small. Only half of my previous one. :(
10. My desktop plays music. But no one listens to music. And I played Spice Girls today really softly after playing 'The best of 1990s' for the past 3 days. Cannot tahan. Wait till I burn my Japanese pop. I think the sub that sits in front of me will cry.
All in all, culture shock for the first few days which was understandable. Now I have to try to adjust my sleeping time to a more normal timing. I am still sleeping at 4am. And waking up at 9.30 if I'm lucky. Eyebags are gonna sag lower than my boobs if I don't stop doing this.
It's 4 am now. I go sleep!
Bintang Chronicles TBC!!!
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